I got MORE answers!

A Christian Girl (who goes by ANOTHER NAME in real life, namely my OLDEST brother....)

Mitchell seems like a really cool and hot guy. Why do people call him donkey? Is he your favorite brother? And would you save some adavan for he and you. to take on next vacation? I mean if he wants some....

Mitchell, why do you insist on leaving comments on my blog with ridiculous names? *sigh* Very well, I'll answer your question, as if it were from a REAL LIVE HUMAN.

My brother is a VERY cool guy. Hot? Dear God, I dunno, that's just ICKY. I would imagine people call him DONKEY because he is an ass. He is ONE of my favorite brothers. And HELL NAW, he ain't gettin' none of my ativan (you spelled it wrong, douchebag). Because he goes and tells Miss Katie that I gave it to him. Hi, Kate! Your hair looks lovely today!

NOW GO AWAY, annoying anonymous older brother....

Burfica (God love her, she ALWAYS comes through for me):

okay here is a question for you, how come you didn't go do my cuss o meter?????
Dammit!!!
And how come I don't get no lessie marriage kind of love.
FUCK!!!

Burfie, I DID go do your cuss-o-meter. And believe it or not, I didn't score as high as you. I bow to the queen of cursing, oh Burfeous One...
And I'm sorry I've not given you any marriage proposals... *down on one knee* Burfie, will you do me the honor?

Avitable:

1. Why the fuck am I not on your blogroll?
2. What do you recommend for getting semen out of hair and clothing?
3. What's the dirtiest thing you've ever done?
4. What made you decide to blog?
5. What are your feelings on ass to mouth?


1. You are not on my blogroll? I'll have to fix that... I'm sure it's just a mistake. You know, like how I'M NOT ON YOURS?
2. I recommend that you never get semen IN your hair or clothing. Barring that? I dunno, try peanut butter. It works on chewing gum, dude...
3. I'm not sure how to take this question. I can think of three separate ways to do dirty things. So, I'll answer them all a) I kicked over a chewing tobacco spit can at 5:00 a.m. one morning when I was 16 years old. I snuck up early to call my boyfriend, because I was grounded from the phone. As He usually does, God got me back my putting a spit can (which was FULL, oh GOD, WHY?) on the end of my foot. b) The rottenest thing I ever did, besides the Lisa incident, was when I was first married and I went through the drive thru at the bank to cash a 15 dollar check. The girl gave me 100 dollars, and I kept it. c) Sexually, I never really got to be a "dirty" girl. I married the first man I ever doinked.
4. I actually started blogging about 3 or 4 years ago. A friend I met online suggested I do it. He said I had a very descriptive way of writing, and also that I was crazy enough that I needed to get some things OUT of me. Several blogs, and lots of friends, heartaches, and laughter later, here I am...
5. As a general rule, I am vehemently opposed to mouths and asses joining in any manner. However, there are times when "ass kissers" serve their purpose...


Not a Granny:

Hmmm after Avitable's questions I am kind of frightened.

What is your favorite food?
What was/is your favorite vacation spot?

Avitable scares me too, man.

My favorite food... that would have to be NEARLY FUCKING EVERY FOOD. I am a lover of all things edible. But, in the interest of baring it all, here are some of my faves: Cheeseburgers, spaghetti, pizzza, lasagna, cheesecake, Little Debbie Nutty Bars, Twinkies! Cool Ranch Dorito's, turkey! with dressing! and bread and butter pickles.

My favorite vacation spot is My Brother's Big Giant Plantation Home. In Georgia. Because he has a pool in his backyard, he buys yummy food, he makes me laugh, and when I walk through his front door, all my worries and problems melt away and I am loved and pampered for the duration of my stay there. Besides his house, I would have to say the beach, any beach. I sooo love the giant gigantical-ness of the ocean. It puts things in quiet perspective for me. My problems ain't so big....

to be continued...